...And just when I thought I wouldn't find anything interesting to write about...it occurred to me that I have a plethora of subject matter right where I work!
My favorite customer
I call him "Pops" for lack of a better name. It's not that I don't care what his name is, it's just that Pops is fitting. He's probably mid sixties, Caucasian, sporting shoulder length gray hair. He wears a recognizable beret, and he has a hippy-dignified mustache. A vet of some war, he's a starving artist who's livelihood consists of odd painting and construction jobs. He wears a long black tweed jacket, and walks with a slow and intentioned swagger. I usually only see him in the evening when I'm working in the cafe. He says "hi," and asks if he can steal the leftover papers that people purchase and leave behind. He then asks if he's bothering me. Clearly, he's not, but after Al got kicked out of Lunds permanently for being a hella creep, Pops is cautious.
Pops is also racist, and really doesn't like gays. The ads in the back of the free Minneapolis newspapers are full of disgusting homosexual content, which is just gross. He thinks his refrigerator is bugged by the Chinese who produce and import machines to the U.S. His fridge makes noises of different frequencies, like music.
Although he's not actually paranoid, these idiosyncratic biases are really rich in humor.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Food I Ate Today (through 3:00 pm)
Cocoa Krispies and milk
Creamed Spinach
Coffee
Jujubees
Ruffles, Loaded Chili and Cheese
Creamed Spinach
Coffee
Jujubees
Ruffles, Loaded Chili and Cheese
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
The Rapture
It has come to my attention that The Rapture is heading our way. Word on the street says May 21, 2011?
I think we can all agree that the best resource available to answer our questions about this phenomenon is Wikipedia. It's pretty straightforward, really...
... and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
- 1 Thessalonians
I think we can all agree that the best resource available to answer our questions about this phenomenon is Wikipedia. It's pretty straightforward, really...
... and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
- 1 Thessalonians
If we can make any conclusions about The Rapture, it's that this Saturday, Christians will be abducted. Their worldly possessions will be up for grabs, and all the nonbelievers will finally begin to believe that there actually is a God. The agnostics will praise his name, thanking him for removing all the religiously insane from the Earth.
***
On another note: it's summer for me now--and the living is straight up easy. My toughest challenge today: eating an entire Qdoba burrito and biking home after. It was also challenging getting up from my post-meal nap to go watch "Sixteen and Pregnant" with some friends.
Grades are being posted--I'm noticing my GPA might be taking a burn this semester. And while everyone else seems to be graduating early, I have another year...and then another five semesters...before I see some returns on my investment. But let's be real--no one wants to work, and in college, one readily finds excuses to be irresponsible. I will miss this world when the time comes...and so will the Christians when Jesus beams them into outer space.
Grades are being posted--I'm noticing my GPA might be taking a burn this semester. And while everyone else seems to be graduating early, I have another year...and then another five semesters...before I see some returns on my investment. But let's be real--no one wants to work, and in college, one readily finds excuses to be irresponsible. I will miss this world when the time comes...and so will the Christians when Jesus beams them into outer space.
Friday, May 13, 2011
Friday the 13th
In the footsteps of the fair Tiara Christenson of Marshfield, I have decided to construct a blog. This blog is called "Bliggity Blog," and I already regret such a poor title. In good taste, however, I avoided alliterating this blog to be "Becky's Bliggity Blog," or something silly like that...
Syllabus:
Carrie Bradshaw and Hank Moody, of, respectively, the television worlds of "Sex and the City" and "Californication," justify writing as a medium for thought excavation and for showcasing some fucking good writing skills. It is within this blog I, too, will excavate and showcase.
Oh, today is Friday the 13th.
Also, I now enter the world of summer. This entails pure laziness, as well as failing to achieve set "summer goals." However, already five hours into the thick of summer, I am disproving all prior years of summer behavior by making this fine blog!
In case you were wondering: I took my last physiology exam this morning at 8 AM. In hopes of maintaining the integrity of such a challenging class, Dr. Anderson challenged my ability to feel smart in any way.
On another note, I will be celebrating my lack of intelligence tonight with my dear friend and blog-inspirer Tiara in the following ways:
mind-and-body-decaying substances such as a) "Graeter's" fucking-delicious-irresistible-and-expensive ice cream b) Jameson whiskey c) romantic comedies.
And I so do look forward to nights of reveling in the freedom of warm weather and school-free activities.
Finally, if anyone in the abyss of the inter-web happens to read this, the world is a much less lonely place. If no one reads this, at least I increased the need for band-width or something. Or dented the limitless memory of a nonexistent space.
Syllabus:
Carrie Bradshaw and Hank Moody, of, respectively, the television worlds of "Sex and the City" and "Californication," justify writing as a medium for thought excavation and for showcasing some fucking good writing skills. It is within this blog I, too, will excavate and showcase.
Oh, today is Friday the 13th.
Also, I now enter the world of summer. This entails pure laziness, as well as failing to achieve set "summer goals." However, already five hours into the thick of summer, I am disproving all prior years of summer behavior by making this fine blog!
In case you were wondering: I took my last physiology exam this morning at 8 AM. In hopes of maintaining the integrity of such a challenging class, Dr. Anderson challenged my ability to feel smart in any way.
On another note, I will be celebrating my lack of intelligence tonight with my dear friend and blog-inspirer Tiara in the following ways:
mind-and-body-decaying substances such as a) "Graeter's" fucking-delicious-irresistible-and-expensive ice cream b) Jameson whiskey c) romantic comedies.
And I so do look forward to nights of reveling in the freedom of warm weather and school-free activities.
Finally, if anyone in the abyss of the inter-web happens to read this, the world is a much less lonely place. If no one reads this, at least I increased the need for band-width or something. Or dented the limitless memory of a nonexistent space.
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